I wanna do bad things with you
by Nick.Tsuki
Summary: When Itachi can't understand what he wants with Deidara and said blonde attempts to leave him, what's his reaction? Deidara wants to leave with a special goodbye, will Itachi grant it? ItaDei. OneShot. Lemon. R


**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or its characters. © Masashi Kishimoto**

**Warning: This chapter contains sexual innuendos, sexual situations between men and violence. Not recommended for all publics.**

**That's the 11th chapter of my story 'Meet me under the cherry tree' (a SasukexNaruto novel), but as it can be read (more or less) separately, I've decided to put it as a one-shot as well.**

**I wanna do bad things with you**

Itachi's point of view

I frown when the doorbell rings, wondering what Sasuke could have forgotten. My surprise is clearly exposed on my features as he simply arches his eyebrow at me as if I should be waiting his apparition.

"What do you want?" I end up asking coldly, feeling my expression closing into a serious one.

He smirks mischievous at me "Won't you invite me in first, yeah?"

"Hn." I step at the side opening the door further so he can enter.

He mutters an 'excuse me' punctuating each slow step he takes into my apartment, turning around to face me only two steps apart.

The silence is heavy and so is my anxiety. His blue eyes stares at me with curiosity, analyzing me like a child does to a new toy, curious, amused, and something else I can't name.

Finally, unable to stand the silent pressure, I open my month just enough to free punctual words, not showing the anxiety on my tone. "I thought you didn't want to see my face ever again."

The corner of his lips turn into a sadistic smile "I don't." he says easily, sure of his words. He really doesn't want to see my face.

I can't see the point of his visit, so I can only finish it before it gets worse, before I can do something I'll regret, again. "I see" I reopen the door for him "Bye."

He looks at the open door with an arched eyebrow "Do you hate me that much, yeah?" Once again he walks with slow marked steps to the door, but instead of walking away and leaving, Deidara closes it. He smiles at me, much closer than he was. Close enough to make me feel self-conscious and nervous.

"You are the one who hates me." I remind him.

"I do." He hates me. I hate myself.

"Then why?" A bit of trembling mixed with a bit of a pleading tints my question. Why, if not for making me more miserable?

"Because I'm leaving and I don't want to have any regret, yeah."

"Did you come to apologize to me?" I arch an eyebrow at him, crossing my arms.

"I have nothing to apologize for…" he protests firmly, then sighs and voices with determination "I came here to beg you one last thing."

I want to say 'anything', 'everything', 'whatever you want', but instead "What?"

"A kiss."

I swallow "Why?"

"Because I'm leaving." He answers as if it's so simple.

"Why me?" My voice gets weaker.

"Because I'm leaving you."

And then I smirk, a sour taste in my mouth. "Then I'm not kissing you."

Deidara takes a step closer to me, his face blank. I let his fingers touch my lips as he is doing nothing, but there's a tingling sensation on them. "I beg you." He whispers so low I can't recognize his voice, it's like it's someone else's.

"No." I answer coldly.

"Please." His arms wraps around my shoulders. "It's not the first time, yeah."

But it would be the last. This single thought makes me realize I…

"Itachi." I'm back to reality, far from my thoughts to the vision of my blonde best friend leaning forward. I can't.

I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. It's wrong. It's so wrong it makes me dizzy. I…

"Please don't." I intend to beg him, but it comes out cold, demanding.

He leans his forehead to mine and sighs, his eyes are closed but I can tell he has tears on them. Deidara takes a step behind, taking his arms off me, making me feel cold. "I see."

Then he turns around and I can hear him muttering something I can't quite understand. After a millisecond, my brain translates it.

"Bye Tachi."

Maybe it's the goodbye, but maybe it's how he called my name. It keeps ringing in my head making something snap inside of me.

I hold him from behind, my arms around him, locking his arms, his whole tense body. "You can't." I growl in his ear. "You can't do it. I didn't kiss you… You can't leave me if I don't kiss you, Deidara."

He laughs. But there's no humor in it. "What kind of logic is that, hm?" he spits. "No, don't answer. I should have known. You can't have things out of your fucking control, right?" his tone is low, but threatening, anyway I don't let him go. "You can't simply do as I asked for once and leave me the hell alone, yeah."

"No, I can't. I won't."

He forces himself out of my firm grip, turning around to glare at me, his mouth is pressed together in a thin line and he's fuming. I can't hide my smirk to his reaction. Something in me simply takes pleasure in seeing him this frustrated. Frustrated at me, because of me.

He only looks more frustrated, bawling his hands into fists by his sides, shaking from contained anger. Deidara have always had a short and explosive temper, so I know it takes barely anything to make him scream and get mad. And I also know I want it.

It's twisted even in my mind, but I want it so bad.

I can't contain a dark chuckle at his frustration. It's evil and I know it's risky, but it's stronger than me, stronger than my cold act.

I can hear his teeth clacking together as his final warning he had enough. Years of playing football and martial arts had made my reflexes more than sharp, so it's unfairly easy for me to see his movements, read and prevent them.

My smirk widens when I block his fist a second earlier it makes contact with my face. It only makes him more frustrated, lost. It's beautiful, I can't deny it.

No matter how many times he tries to punch, to kick, to knee or elbow me, I easily dodge and block it all. His face is flushed by the effort and the frustration; his body is shaking and his mouth id panting.

He growls deep in his throat, giving me his fiercest look.

Deidara smiles he hits a punch right on my jaw. It's true it hurts, but it's also nothing to me as a twisted and dark feeling consumes me.

I take pleasure in his panic expression when he finds himself pinned on the wall by me. My hands are firmly holding his wrists on the wall over his head and my leg is between his, letting him locked between my body and the wall.

He tries to struggle, but his angle and the fact I'm taller leaves him in disadvantage. I can hear him panting, I can hear his heart beating like crazy as his eyes start to water in panic, frustration and maybe fear.

"Let me go, un!" Deidara yells at my face, trying to cover his despair. "ITACHI!"

I feel my heart beating much faster. I have never seen him this beautiful. A part of me wants to hurt him for even thinking of leaving my side. A part of me wants to make him cry in total despair and hopelessness. I pant as my thoughts becomes worse and worse. A part of me simply wants to break him.

I lean forward watching closely him struggling harder and harder, shaking his head, closing his eyes. I chuckle by his ear and kiss it. "You asked me, didn't you?"

I kiss his cheek, trailing kisses until his jaw and then I bite his neck as he keeps shaking his head in denial, in rejection.

He keeps turning his head to the side every time I try to kiss him. It makes me mad. It's what he wanted, isn't it? Why deny it now I'm so willing to give?

I hold both his wrists with one hand so I can use my now free hand to clutch on his neck, making Deidara still his head as he breathes heavier through his nose. Once again I see panic on his blue eyes, but he still doesn't break, doesn't let himself surrender.

He closes his eyes tightly when I brush my lips to his and his lips even tighter when I try to force my mouth to his.

I nip and kiss his stubborn lips.

He doesn't let me in, unwilling and fighting to open his mouth and simply surrender. Why? It's so easier for him to simply surrender. Why can't he just open his mouth?! He was the one who wanted to kiss me and now…

I smirk when I feel his mouth moving, opening slowly, but willingly.

He bites my lips with force, brutally and with the clear purpose I let go of him. And I wouldn't have if it weren't for the few seconds my grip loosened. It is fast, but enough for Deidara to shove me off him with all strength a desperate person can gather. I lose balance, trip on something and fall uncharacteristically on my ass.

I expect him to yell at me, demand 'what the fuck is wrong with me', to run, to punch me, to scream any nonsense he can.

Silence.

When I look at him, he's sitting on the floor as myself, holding his knee to his chest as he trembles and takes deep long breaths through his mouth, hyperventilating.

"Deidara." I call as softly as I can; regret and shame washing through my mind.

I can't… I… What have I done? I simply can't remember in details. I can't remember what was going through my mind. It feels I was just watching someone else controlling my body.

Deidara shakes his head, burying it in his knees.

I sigh and stand up, feeling like there's nothing I can do. I go to the kitchen and get a glass of water for Deidara in hope of making the whole situation a tiny better.

I find him still on the floor, but calmer, looking into nothing with reddish blue eyes. He accepts the glass of water I offer in silence.

"Dei… I don't know what happened."

He doesn't answer, just gives me the glass back in a silent plea for leaving him a lone longer. I leave the glass inside the sink and close my eyes to think, trying to repeat the past scene in my head over and over again. Flashes of it change every time I try to remember.

I open my eyes in time to see Deidara walking closer to me. He takes my hand with a blank face and I let myself be dragged by him.

He walks me to my bedroom, to my bed, lying on top of me. I let him.

For the second time, I feel his fingers dancing on my lips, making them tingle. I let him slowly pulls my shirt up until he takes it off exposing my chest. He stares blankly and mumbles something.

"What?" I ask him, causing him to look me in the eye.

"Even if it's out of guilty…" He swallows. "…let me…"

Mutually, we tilt our heads until our lips brush over each other. The kiss is as pure and sweet as a first kiss. It's slow and almost hesitant.

"Close your eyes and pretend, un." He whispers after we break the kiss.

I feel his lips on my pulse, sucking and nipping with care; his hands walking and dancing on my chest, abdomen, my hip…

I shudder and permit myself to just feel, permit myself to moan into the pleasure of warm hands and quick nips. Deidara kisses me again, and I grip his hair, bringing him closer to me. I can feel him all around me, like I'm floating.

I open my eyes and see him. I want to see him. Deidara.

"Deidara… I don't want to-"

"Just pretend, un." He hurriedly says before I can finish.

I shake my head, brushing his hair behind his ear. "No… I don't want to pretend. If it's out of guilty, out of jealously or even for you to not leave me, I don't know and I don't care. I want it."

"Fuck Itachi." I see him taking off his hoodie and t-shirt so quickly it becomes desperate. "And I was trying to be nice to you, un." This time he's the one pinning me down to bed, his tongue invading my mouth insistently.

It's hot. I know it's Deidara and I can't say it doesn't bother me at all, but it's still so hot. If only he wasn't a guy.

'_If that's the only problem you should think it over. If you ever thought you'd fall for him if he was a girl, don't you think you're already in deep shit, brother?' _I remember Sasuke's words and laugh to myself.

Yes, I'm already in deep shit.

"What are you laughing for, un?" Deidara asks me angry, arching an eyebrow.

I lick his bottom lip, nipping it lightly. "Secret."

He moans and dismisses my answer, submitting himself to me in his own way. I take the opportunity to turn him over, wanting to have him under me, moaning loud, shuddering, feeling me, _me._

The same dark feelings start growing inside me without my permission. I growl, pinning Deidara with more force into the mattress, startling him with the sudden change.

"Shit, I can't do it!" I curse, freeing his arms and sitting on bed.

Why the fuck is he making me feel it? I'm not like this! _I'm not!_ I wasn't until now. Why is that all of a sudden I have this urge to… no, Itachi, breathe.

I breathe into my hands in an attempt to clear my mind, forgetting about Deidara for the second. But it doesn't take long for him to explode, frustrated as much as myself. There's not logic to it, no reason!

"That's why I told you to pretend, yeah! You fucking bitch!"

"THAT'S NOT IT!" I end up yelling at him. It's a first. I shake my head. "That's not it, Deidara."

"Then what the fuck is it, un?!" He doesn't understand. He can't understand. Why can't he understand? "Stop making a fool of myself! STOP IT, UN! I HATE IT, HATE IT, YEAH! WHY? WHY THE FUCK CAN'T YOU JUST DO IT?!"

I turn myself to him, gripping on his arms; his expression is not afraid, but fierce, stubborn. I use my best low and harsh tone "You want to know fucking why, eh?" My grip tightens to a point I know it's hurting. "Because I want it so much I'm losing my mind." His blue eyes defy me even after I throw him back into the mattress. "I want to hurt you." One hand goes to his hair and the other to his neck, feeling as he swallows. "I want to make you cry, to make you beg, to crush you with my bare hands."

Before I do everything my mind and body urges me to do, I let him go, panting, me and him. We stare at each other in silence, blank and contained expressions. I see his lips moving, but can't hear what sound they produce.

Then. "Do it." A whisper.

I blink at him in confusion, denial. Then he smiles at me, wrapping his hands around my neck and bringing me to his face.

"Do it, Itachi, yeah." He's dead serious. "I want it." He breathes deeply. "Hurt me, un."

I shake my head. That's insane. He's insane. Contrary to that, my hands are itching to touch him.

Deidara hold my hand and puts it around his neck. "I want it, Itachi. I want you to hurt me, to make me cry and beg you… I want to see that red tint in your eyes when you're barely sane, un."

It can't be sane, can't be healthy. The way he says it so sure is twisted. Are we both twisted, messed up in the head? What's this insanity taking over my body, my mind, my whole being?

When Deidara gasps, I see what I'm doing, how my hand is closing around his neck, preventing him from breathing properly. Almost by reflex, I loosen my grip, but the disapproval look on blue eyes causes my hand to tighten again.

He smiles defiantly at me. He'll regret it. _I_ will regret it, but I don't care right now. I'm losing myself to this feeling, to this pure unreasonable insanity. No. Deidara keeps the smile as his hands go to my hair, loosening it and letting it fall free on my back. He smirks evilly at me and pull my hair with force.

I growl, I hate it. I hate when someone touches my hair, even more when they pull it and he knows. He's doing it on purpose, with the clear purpose of making me mad. It works.

I clutch his neck with more force, seeing him attempting to take a long breath of air, failing beautifully. His hand lets go of my hair and I use this opportunity to pin them above his head with my own free hand.

I bite his lip hard enough I can almost taste blood. He whimpers under me and I know I've won. It feels too good. I don't want to lose time with foreplay or sweet talking. I want it fast, hard, make him beg me for his life.

I feel cruel, a part of me I didn't even know existed, but Deidara brought it up. It's all his fault and I'll punish and torture him for that.

"You- you're still thinking, yeah." Deidara says weakly, panting. "Don't think, Itachi. Just do it, un. Lose yourself to me, Tachi." He moans in the end, moving his hips under me making his point clear.

My body trembles in excitement, in agony of not getting enough. "Don't move." I warn him and desperately pull his pants down his legs with a bit of his help. Mine goes more smoothly, but just as desperate. I take it all off, from me, from him, exposing him, wanting to see more and more. I need it.

I hear the sound of cloth ripping, but it's too far from my consciousness, which is fading more and more by the second. Deidara defies me by pulling my hair again, urging me to hurry. I stop and glare at him, the message evident in my eyes.

He pulls harder. "Don't be gentle, un! You're gentle to everyone! I hate it, un!"

My hand stings from the slap it lands on his cheek. He laughs out loud maniacally. I love and hate the sound of it. It's disturbing.

His cheek is red, but again, his whole face is red, flushed by excitement. The sound of the nightstand's drawer opening irritates me. The fact my hands are trembling and can't get what I want infuriates me. The mocking laughter Deidara produces causes me to slap him again, yelling at him to stop. He continues, his eyes glowing with something I'm sure my own eyes also hold.

I open his legs without care, making him gasp, his eyes watering. I don't look at him, don't look at anywhere but his twitching hole and leaking cock. For the first time, I'm far too lost in insanity to care about it, about anything.

Two of my fingers, coated in lube, enter him in one go, making him hiss, tears finally, _finally,_ falling from his eyes as he automatically tightens his asshole. More patiently than I feel, I thrust my fingers slowly in and out of him, feeling his inner muscles getting used to the invasion.

I add two more fingers for measure. Deidara is no longer a virgin, far from it. And this single thought drives me crazy, making me force my fingers inside him faster. He cries out loud, in pain, in pleasure, in ecstasy. It hurts; I'm sure, but not enough to cause him serious damage.

I bite his chest until I see the perfect set of my teeth on his skin; his collarbone until he yells that it hurts, sobbing but not stopping me. I bite his neck, over and over again, trying to bite hard enough to tear the skin so I taste his blood.

It's carnal.

I hate the time I take to put on the condom. I hate the time I take to guide my hard member to his hole, missing by my trembling hands. I hate the fact I can't thrust into him in one. He's too tight.

His hairy legs, his flat chest, his cock, his growing beard, his manly scent, his large hands, everything that I hated to be reminded of Deidara disappears when I'm fully inside him. There're only the crying eyes, desperate and insane, the panting mouth, yelling in pain, yelling in pleasure, yelling my name; and his inner muscles clutching my member.

I move in a rough rhythm, but it's not enough. I still feel frustrated and can't get it out of my chest no matter how much my fingers dig in his flesh, or my teeth bite him. It's still not enough.

I scream my frustration out.

Not enough. It's maddening.

Deidara grabs both sides of my head and brings our lips together. I anticipate a desperate, sloppy and rough kiss, but when his lips mold to mine as he slowly moves his tongue inside my mouth, I stop my body. The rough and fast rhythm stops and there's only his mouth, his tongue swirling to mine.

My best friend, my first true friend, my... Deidara whispers after he breaks the kiss "It's okay Tachi, un. I'm here. You can break down, yeah." His face is wet, flushed and swollen, but his voice is so sure I can only bury my head into his neck and start moving again.

He holds me, arms and legs around my body, taking in everything I have, every rough thrust, every harsh bite, everything. He groans deep in his throat, but it's not loud, contained.

Again and again until I'm floating in pleasure. Spotlights behind my eyes tightly closed, my teeth biting my lower lip. And a moment of nothing.

When I find myself, I'm crying into his shoulder, his hands caressing my hair. I mumble nonsenses.

"…Can't leave me. You can't. I will not let you go, never." I sob, can't breathe. "I hate it so much. I hate it when they lied, when they said to be my friends. I believed them…" Deidara's hands are soothing. "I hated to go to the hospital. I hated my dad, my mom… I hated Sasuke."

"It's fine, Itachi. It's over, un." His voice is far, but I can hear it.

"Everything and everyone I hated. I hated you." Sobbing and sobbing into his shoulder as he caresses my back, my hair, my soul. Talking nonsense, screaming at my past, screaming at myself.

I take in the bruised and marked body of his. I did it. The disheveled hair, the swollen face, red eyes, bleeding mouth, the pain in his blue eyes. I did it.

Why?

His smile as he presses my head back on his shoulder and holds me. Why?

Tears in my eyes and then…

Nothing.

**It turned out very different from what I expected, but I really like the maddening, disturbing and insane feeling this gives. I can relate to both Deidara and Itachi's characters at some point.**

**So please review and I'll keep on writing :D**


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